I was bullied and here's what I did to stop it. - a wicked little kid's revelation.

Bullying is everywhere.  Even in a small town like ours.

I have a grandma whom I really admire the most. She's the reason that I fear nobody. Even the strictest of all deans, of all teachers, anyone tagged as "terror professor" or boss or whoever. They're no match for my grandma.  I can compare her to my role model Sen. Miriam Defensor. Strict, has a good sense of humor, strong and has a strong conviction for what is right. My grandma thinks differently.  I think it's because she grew up in the US, on a different culture. She speaks her mind out and most people in our town and even our relatives either misunderstood, hated or feared her. I love my grandma so much and I believe everything she says. I live up everything she taught me. Maybe that's the reason I'm misunderstood, hated in school as well.  But that doesn't bother me at all. I can still remember her words: "If you ever get into a fight, I'll defend you whether you're right or wrong. As long as I know you've defended yourself. I'll kick those kids asses and even their parents' if I have to. But if I learn that you we're bullied and allowed yourself to be bullied I'll punish you myself!" That was before I started pre-school.

The first incident was when I was three or four I think. -Just before I got into pre-school. I can't completely recall the details but here's as much as I can remember... My older cousins with some big kids took my toys without permission and returned it completely destroyed and dirty. I got really pissed and instead of saying sorry they said, let your dad or your grandma buy you a new one.  I know my grandma or my dad will replace those toys but those kids will do it over again.  That wasn't the first time they did it. What I did was, I took a long sharp thorn from our calamansi. I called my cousin and and told him I got a present for him. "Give me your hand cousin." When he opened his palm, I stabbed it with the thorn and said "If you ever touch my toys the next thorn goes into your eyes and this also goes to all of your friends!" His hand was full of blood.  Ofcourse, I got caught.  I cried my heart out coz I knew my parents and my grandma will punish me for it. My dad was furious and he grounded me but my grandma knew what happened. She defended me and sent my cousin back to his parents.

Second incident was in pre-school. It was my first day at school. I wanted to join some big kids playing "little sally water" so I asked nicely if I could join. They said you're not allowed here coz we're in prep and you're nursery.  The worst part is one of the girls pushed me out of the circle and I fell off the ground but I never cried.  I use my tears wisely.  The next day I brought a thorn from our calamansi plant. I told the girls if they'd let me in, (which I doubt they would) I'm giving them a special gift. Their leader, the girl who pushed me stared at me like she's going to strangle me said "let me see it first". I said, no let me join you first coz I see you've let some nursery kids in".   She grabbed my arm trying to get what's in my hand, so I stabbed her! I told her if you ever push me again or touch me the next one goes into your eyes! She cried and said she'll tell the principal and her parents so I get punished! I said, ok go ahead and tell your parents and I'll pluck their eyes too! The guard saw the whole incident but didn't really know what happened. When she was asked she said she saw the kid yell at me and grab my arm. So when I was confronted I by my parents and the principal,  I had to ride on to the guard's story.  I said she tried to grab what I was holding, just something I picked up on the ground, which is true, and she got accidentally pricked. I had to cry my heart out and acted like I was traumatized that I didn't want to go to school anymore. Like I was the victim.  I didn't tell anyone else even my dad about this except my grandma. She defended me as agreed. She went to my school and told the princopal I was really traumatized and I didn't want to go to school anymore. The kid was suspended and eventually she was transferred to another schedule so we don't get to see each other.


  Elementary. There's this kid whom I treated as my best friend. I was in the first grade she was on the third. I used to bring her chocolates and some goodies and some snacks everyday.  My snacks were always times two. Later, she started to ask things from me and I hate people who ask me for something.  My grandpa says that begging or asking something from other people is bad manners.  You should learn how to wait for people to give.  That's how he'd lecture me about asking.  I give especially if I have more and the other person has none. I have a heart for the needy like my grandma. We used to go downtown and my grandma has this bag of coins packed in small ice candy plastic bags. She would give it to those she thought needed it most. The old, the crippled gets those coins. She also sponsored some charity. One day, my "best friend" asked how much money I have for that day. I told her, I have a hundred for my lunch and snacks. She said, give it to me coz you don't need it. Your grandma  sent you cookies for your snacks and food lunch so that's good enough for you. I gave it to her but I was pissed. I didn't bring her anything the next day. She asked me why I didn't bring her snacks that day. I answered, coz I gave you a hundred pesos yesterday. She was mad and she turned all her friends against me. We were on our car pool and everyone started yelling at me, "devil, devil". A kid even threw bubble gum at me. It hit my skirt and damn! My nanny had a hard time taking it off! I came home and  went straight to our backyard and I saw my grandma's new landscaping project and found out they had cut my Calamansi plant. That afternoon, I asked for new Greg shoes,  one with a hard toe and a large buckle. With no questions asked, my grandma bought it that same afternoon. Maybe she knew I was up to something. Later, she asked me what was wrong and I told her I got into a fight but it's something I can handle. The next day, in the car pool, every one was still yelling at me, "devil,devil" and throwing pieces of paper at me. I stood up and kicked my ex best friend's face with my hard sole large buckled shoe. Yes, in the face! And it was bloody! She fought back and I got scratches and some scrapes all over my arms and face. I cried really hard like it's wasn't my fault. My grandma had to step in. When the car pool stopped by she asked, "who did this to my "daughter"?!? The kid said, "she kicked me in the face! She started it."  I went inside and  I didn't know what my grandma told the kids that they were all so nice to me the next day and for the rest of the days. After that incident my grandma had to hire a driver to send me to school so I didn't get to be with those kids again.

  In highschool. Our batch was the wierdest one. There's this sorority type, where in, you have to be bullied first, obey orders to be in their group. They act as if they were the cool ones, the mean girls. We also have a class governor that everyone followed even if she was wrong most of the time. Me and my real best friend, think differently. We were the class rebels. We don't follow orders from anyone. We're the only two people who didn't vote for the governor. Voting was confidential but guess what -  it was broadcasted in class, everyone knew about it.  We didn't fear anybody.  We were into all sorts of martial arts and my dad takes me to the shooting range on weekends. We know were stronger than all of them so there's no way we were going to follow them. It's just funny to recall that all my batchmates follow the leader like they were hypnotized. They were like minions. I don't hate them for doing so. Some of them are just scared. Scared to be left out, scared to be alone, scared to be bullied.  Didn't want to be hated. I knew I was in the group's hate list coz I never attempted to join. In their group, if they hate you and they'd see that you're desperate to join them, they'd re-consider after a lot of bullying and following orders and kissing asses. I know they hated me and I didn't mind if they kept hating. Some of my haters love to back-bite but they never touched me, argued, confronted me or even yelled "devil, devil". I waited my whole highschool life for someone to yell at me or argue or something but no one ever dared. Maybe because I laid low focusing on my sports and academics, piano, hanging out with my friends and I didn't care about haters. Or maybe they knew I will punch them in the face if they do. Which I'd be pleased to do so.

  I was never bullied in college. It was the best days of my life. I was even nominated as vice president of the school student council. I met a lot of friends and all I can think of is getting on top of the class, seeing 90+ on my school card and having fun. Parties and all.  Ironically,  I joined a sorority.  Not because I needed people to cling on to, but for camaraderie, help on charity projects, and clean fun.

  Ten years later. I got tired of life in the big city so I decided to go back home to our small town. I met my high school friends. No, I can't call them friends. Just colleagues or batchmates. I was just being civil but I didn't really like them don't really hate them though.  Let's say that, for me they're just a face and a name.  They were in the "group"  back in high school. I was forced to hang out with them one time because of my other batchmate/neighbor who I was with that time.  She's also a member of the group.  I  don't hate her and I respect her decision for joining.  Also goes with the rest or their friends.  I don't hate all of them. Actually, I don't really hate anybody.  I'm not the kind of person who would hold grudges.  So, that time I was just trying to be "civil".  I sat with them and had a few drinks. I was trying to observe if they got over high school. But looked like they didn't or just - she didn't. I was out of place the whole time, so I spent time ordering food and drinks not listening to what they're talking about.  I wouldn't be able to relate anyway.  I was waiting for someone to call it a night and thank God the ordeal of being with her/them was done! On our way home, I was going to take a cab but the car owner and my neighbor said they were gonna drop me off. So I thought it will be rude to insist of getting a cab. After they dropped me off their car fell into a gutter. "The-She-who-didn't-get-over-highschool-grudges" called me as if it was my fault. It's clearly not my fault. I wasn't there when it happened.  I asked a few friends about it.  I asked if I'm responsible for anything and even asked my childhood friend who's now a lawyer. Coz if I was responsible, I'd pay for damages.  It was a block away and I went there anyway to check on them. The "she" asked me to get her coffee. I don't take orders from anybody! But I did. I took water from my dog's water container and made coffee for her. My dog had anti rabies shots so she'd be fine. And my dog didn't touch the water yet. With his mouth at least... just his paws!!! I gave her coffee and she complained that it had creamer! I didn't know why it tasted like it had creamer when I didn't put creamer on it! Ah, maybe because, I haven't cleaned up the container for months!!!  I knew the others wouldn't drink coffee just "the she". If the others demand for coffee I'd prepare my special ingredients for them as well.  My colleagues' car, had a few scratches when it was pulled out of the gutter.  I even went back to the mechanic to ask how much damage it got.  The mechanic said just some scratches. But "the she" posted on facebook that it was totally wrecked. I didn't see any of the owner's comments though. All I saw was "the she's" comments telling all their minions about it. She was trying to turn people against me since pre-school and never succeeded. Well maybe just some of her minions.  I still got a lot of friends and her minions doesn't matter. I made a new facebook account and blocked them all! I didn't wanna hear any of the can't-get-over-high-school talks. Days later I bought myself a car I can use in our little town. No more riding in cars with batchmates from then on! Never again!

 I was out in a bar with my grade school buddy. We met some batchmates who were in "the group" and another girl asked my buddy "why are you with her?" - like I have a virus or something contagious. My grade school buddy told me about it and we had a good laugh. Well, there are really some people who can't get over high school grudges. Maybe because they have nothing else to worry about in their miserable lives. Nothing special to think of but high school life. Maybe high school was the best experience they had in their whole existence. I can't blame them and it doesn't really bother me. I respect their decision to be minions forever.  I have an exciting life and lots of great memories to think of, a busy work schedule and my mind can't contain their names and faces anymore.  I just tried to remember the details for this article.


>>>> I'm not encouraging violence on this article.  Follow what I say don't follow what I do.  I just want to point out.  Nobody deserves to be bullied and nobody should allow themselves to be bullied!<<<<

-originally published in wicked little kid's diary





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